Wednesday, 4 March 2009

I LOVE MONEY 205

A TAILOR MADE STRATEGY

How do you combat an almighty alliance? You form your own almighty alliance. That's what the Soviet Union tried to do. But they were communists.

This week's MVP.
Buddha is last week's news clippings. This game should open up now regardless of the teams reshuffle. With their common enemy a-gone the starlets should start showing their true colours.

Myammee's colour is transparant. She's isolated on the new Green Team - her being the only former loyal green on the squad. Should they lose the next challenge she knows she's in the box. Gold Team wouldn't be able to resist; She was pals with Buddha.

Prancer and Cali solidify their friendship into a bi-lateral agreement. It had to be done. They've been bit-part players - expendable to the old Gold alliance. Saaphyri, queen of the old Gold, clocks them talking in the pool. She's suspicious.
A new day a new challenge. Cali wants to be captain of the new Green Team. Prancer wants to be captain of the new Gold Team. Believe me it was deftly done.

I'm not the kind of guy to say I told you so.
CJ tells the kids each team will be tethered during the challenge…
Not a one of them graduated magna cum laude.

During said challenge there's a major Myammee then Cali screw up.
Yup. Green Team lost. Again.

Cali's faux pas intensifies Saaphyri's suspicions. As I see it the mistake was genuine. Our Cali is not going through life reliant on her brains.
No matter. Saaphyri's suspicions are now turbo charged and guess what? She's not paranoid.
Cali immediately volunteers herself into the box. Like a good samurai she's falling on her sword.

¿What?

There is no way Cali would jack-in-the-box unless she was certain of safety. Saaphyri is enraged. It was she who formulated the two-team back up strategy (as performed by herself and Buckwild in episodes 202 – 204). To paraphrase - This is an attempt by the dorks to try to imitate the cool kids and failing drastically (Heathers – rent it).

As for Myammee's cock-up.
"It's a done deal. I'm coming back home to Miami."

Not everyone in the world can say that.

Back at the mansion and Saaphyri is joining the Cali dots, tracing them all the way back to the choice of team captains. Coincidence? Or did Cali throw the challenge?

Fuelled with righteous fury sans Buddha Saaphyri needs a new target. Heads up Myammee. It looks like you've been nominated for a reprieve.
Saaphyri flexes her spot in the pecking order. Just about everybody on both teams listens to her.

Just about.
Saaphyri calls out Cali re her secret alliance with Prancer.
Cali protests but sounds like a pig at a barbecue. Saaphyri invokes royal protocol and announces who's going in the box tomorrow.
You're safe but…
Vault time and CJ gives them the requisite 15 minutes to make their decision.
It takes about 15 seconds.
The new Gold Team put Prancer to rights: send Cali home. Because Saaphyri said so.
But the power outing looks fun.
"Last show I jumped out of a plane... Every show
I come on I have to risk my life."

Back at the mansion Tailor Made wakes from his sleeper cell. He rallies Ice and Bonez.
"It's obvious the old Entertainer alliance still exists."

Hitherto known as Old Gold (starring Queen Saaphyri King Frank and Princess Buckwild. Also starring Heat/Caliente as the lieutenant, 20 Pack as the commander-in-chief and Frenchie as the expendable one).

Tailor Made plans to include and recruit everyone else.
… er.
Back at the power outing Prancer is figuring out things for herself.
Her reasoning is the three physically weakest players should have been in the box – MILF Frenchie and Saaphyri(?) The fact that they're not proves/confirms there's an alliance.
Never underestimate the IQ of a good looking girl. That's what they want you to do.

Prancer calls out MILF on her allegiance to Old Gold...
Never over estimate the IQ of a porno-reject.

Prancer chooses Myammee for the one-on-one. Now these two have history. Bad history.
They bury it. And come up with the same plan Tailor Made did.

The power outing returns to the mansion. The (new) Gold Team have a meeting to put Prancer to rights: send home Cali.
Then.
¿What?
Tailor Made wants to know 'why' both teams want the same person gone. It doesn't make any sense.
Neither does Buckwild.

She can blubber all she wants but no one's giving Tailor Made a straight answer.

20 Pack is the de facto leader of the Old Gold faction in the (new) Gold Team (follow me). Faced with tailor made dissent we see his stratagem: he spits out his dummy and tells Prancer to do what she likes.Time for eliminations and I think Prancer fancies CJ.
He asks the three nominees to plead their cases.
It's just like last week MILF. Remeber?

It's an act. It's a secret alliance.

Has she had surgery done? Brain transfusion? There's a duck-billed platypus in Chester zoo that thinks it's a skank.

Prancer wants this over with. So the first cheque awarded will be the voided one. She shouts out Cali.
Prancer (to Cali): "Just be happy it's not you".

It's you.
She babbles on about something relating to her son and how she's going to try to get custody back (now that she's shagged Real, couldn't shag Buddha and is being evicted from Mexico she'll need to fill in her days somehow).

Old Gold is furious.
But are they clued in?

"Although the Entertainer's alliance is strong their
weakness is that they're cocky and arrogant."


Next week on I Love Money 2:
The fall of the (Old) Gold Empire.

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